放唔低前度？5 個心理學方法幫你真正放低
🌐 English version
Can't Forget Your Ex? 5 Psychology-Backed Ways to Move On
Why can't you let go?
Psychologists say the pain of a breakup triggers the same brain regions as drug withdrawal. Your brain got used to the dopamine hits from that person — and now it's in withdrawal. Insomnia, loss of appetite, obsessive thoughts — it's not weakness, it's biology.
5 Science-Backed Methods
1. Write it down, then tear it up
Japanese researchers found that writing negative emotions on paper and physically tearing or discarding it significantly reduces anger and sadness. Don't overthink — just dump it out.
2. Reframe your story
Write down 10 reasons why you weren't right for each other. Read it every time they pop into your head. This is cognitive reframing — it helps your brain rebuild accurate memories instead of the filtered highlight reel.
3. Cut digital ties (30 days minimum)
No IG stories, no WhatsApp last seen, no Facebook. Every peek gives your brain another dopamine hit, prolonging withdrawal. You don't have to block — just mute for 30 days.
4. Build new routines
The Saturday cafe, the Netflix show you watched together — these are triggers. Deliberately create new routines to overwrite them: a new gym, a new restaurant, a new series to watch solo.
5. Give yourself a deadline
Tell yourself: "I'll let myself grieve until [date], then I actively move forward." This isn't forcing yourself — it's setting a psychological boundary. Grief needs space, but not indefinitely.
Final thought
Letting go takes time. Don't compare your pace to others. If months pass and you're still struggling, consider talking to a professional. LoveWise's wellness advisors are always here 💚
點解放唔低一個人？
心理學家話，失戀嘅痛楚同戒毒嘅 withdrawal 症狀喺腦入面嘅反應係一樣嘅。你嘅大腦習慣咗嗰個人俾你嘅 dopamine（快樂荷爾蒙），突然冇咗，身體會出現「戒斷反應」—— 失眠、食唔落、成日諗起佢。
所以唔係你軟弱，係你嘅身體真係喺度經歷緊一個生理過程。
5 個科學證實有效嘅方法
1. 寫低，然後撕爛
日本有研究發現，將負面情緒寫喺紙上面，然後親手撕爛或者丟棄，可以有效降低憤怒同悲傷嘅情緒。唔使寫得好靚，just dump it out。
2. 重新 framing 你哋嘅故事
好多人分手後淨係記得好嘅回憶，幫對方加濾鏡。試下寫低 10 個「你哋唔適合」嘅原因。每次諗起佢就拎出嚟睇。呢個叫 cognitive reframing，幫你嘅腦袋重新建立真實嘅記憶。
3. 斷絕 digital connection
唔好再睇佢嘅 IG story、WhatsApp last seen、Facebook。每一睇，你嘅大腦就釋放一劑 dopamine，延長你嘅「戒斷期」。最少 30 日完全唔睇。Block 唔使，mute 就得。
4. 建立新嘅 routine
你同佢一齊做開嘅嘢（例如星期六去某間 cafe、夜晚一齊煲劇），而家會 trigger 你嘅回憶。刻意建立新嘅 routine 去覆蓋舊嘅 — 換一間 gym、試新餐廳、搵新嘅劇自己睇。
5. 俾自己一個 deadline
同自己講：「我會容許自己傷心到 X 月 X 日，之後我會 actively 向前行。」呢個唔係迫自己，而係俾自己一個清晰嘅心理界線。Grief 需要空間，但唔可以冇限期。
最後想講
放低一個人需要時間。唔好同人比較「點解佢咁快好返我唔得」—— 每個人嘅 pace 都唔同。如果幾個月後你仍然覺得好困擾，考慮同專業人士傾下。LoveWise 嘅心靈夥伴隨時喺度陪你傾 💚